Vrajalila Devi DasiGrief, Loss & Marriage Counseling

Your grief is not a failure of faith

Compassionate counseling and grief support for those walking through loss, bereavement, and difficulty in marriage — held with four decades of Bhakti practice and many years of professional training in grief, loss, and couples care.

Individuals, couples & groups · Online and in person · Confidential

Where this work begins

“If my faith were stronger, I wouldn’t be crying”

“Because I am a devotee, I shouldn’t feel this sad.”

Grief touches every soul in this material world, and yet so many of us feel unprepared to speak openly about it. When a loved one departs, or when we face a devastating material reversal, subtle doubting thoughts creep in. We begin to measure our sorrow against our spiritual practice and find ourselves wanting.

I would like to dismantle that misconception completely. Tears are not evidence of weak faith. The women of the Srimad Bhagavatam grieved deeply, and their grief is recorded without shame. Devotion and sorrow have always lived side by side.

You are welcome here exactly as you are — grieving, exhausted, angry, numb, or unsure why you came at all.

About

Vrajalila Devi Dasi

I am a Bhakti practitioner of more than four decades, with long experience in leadership, teaching, and pastoral care within ISKCON. Guided by HH Bhakti-tirtha Swami, I helped pioneer temples and preaching centers in West and Central Africa, and spent nearly ten years traveling, teaching, and cultivating aspiring devotees.

I later returned to Washington, D.C., where I supported my spiritual teacher in developing The Institute for Applied Spiritual Technology (IFAST). My husband, Ekavira Das, and I then served at the Gita Nagari Farm Community, where we live today. In 2004 we fulfilled our Guru’s final request by serving as his primary caregivers until he transitioned in 2005.

That period of caregiving and loss shaped everything that followed. I have contributed extensively to the early Devotee Care initiatives, coauthored the Devotee Care Manual, and facilitated workshops internationally. My work brings together professional training and devotional life, supporting individuals and communities in cultivating emotional health as a bridge to joyful, sustainable, everyday Krishna Conscious practice.

Training & credentials

  • Karuna Care Pastoral Care Provider — certified
  • Grief and Loss Education with David Kessler
  • Brainspotting — BIPOC Phase 1
  • Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFT)
  • Conflict Resolution & Mediation training
  • Nonviolent Communication — over thirty years of practice
  • Bhakti practice — over four decades

Offerings

Ways we can work together

Available online, and in person at Gita Nagari by arrangement.

Individual

Grief & loss counseling

For the days, months, and years after a departure — and for the grief that arrives before one.

  • Bereavement and mourning
  • Loss of a spouse, parent, or child
  • Anticipatory grief and caregiving
  • Grief that feels stuck or unspeakable
  • Doubt and spiritual crisis after loss
  • Devastating material reversals

Couples

Marriage & couples counseling

Informed by Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy and many years of Grihastha care.

  • Communication and recurring conflict
  • Rebuilding trust and closeness
  • Grieving together after a loss
  • Premarital and early-marriage support
  • Mediation for difficult decisions

Pastoral

Karuna Care pastoral support

Devotional care for those who want their spiritual life held in the room alongside their sorrow.

  • Pastoral accompaniment through illness and dying
  • Support for caregivers and family members
  • Care after a departure in the community

Community

Workshops & devotee care training

Facilitated internationally for temples, communities, and leadership teams.

  • Grief and loss workshops
  • Devotee care training
  • Nonviolent Communication practice
  • Conflict resolution and mediation

Ongoing gatherings

Grief is lighter in good company

Grief support

Karuna Care Grief Support Groups

Facilitated groups for those carrying a loss, where sorrow is spoken aloud without apology and met with devotional care. A place to discover that you are neither alone nor failing.

Founded 2021

Heart-to-Heart

A weekly international Vaishnavi sangha that I founded and direct — a steady circle for women in Bhakti to speak honestly about their inner lives and support one another.

Study & sangha

The Wisdom of the Sages Sangha

A facilitated gathering drawing on the wisdom of the sages and applying it to the emotional realities of everyday devotional life.

To join any of these, please send me a note and I will share the current schedule.

Talks & teaching

Invite me to speak

Signature talk

Faith and Grief: A Compassionate Look at Loss & Grief

We discuss a topic that touches every single soul in this material world, and yet one we often feel unprepared to share openly about — the impact of grief and loss in our lives. When we experience the departure of a loved one, or face a devastating material reversal, subtle doubtful thoughts can creep into our minds.

“Because I am a devotee, I shouldn’t feel this sad. If my faith was stronger, I wouldn’t be crying.”

Together we completely dismantle that misconception. We explore the losses of several women in the Srimad Bhagavatam and learn important lessons from how they grieved. We also hear how modern-day women in Bhakti process their own tragic losses.

Suitable for temple programs, sanghas, retreats, devotee care teams, and online gatherings. Enquire about availability.

Approach

What our time together is like

Unhurried. Grief keeps no schedule, and marriages do not repair on a timeline. You set the pace, and I will not press you toward tidy resolution.

Professionally trained and devotionally grounded. I bring years of training in grief, loss, and couples care together with decades of Bhakti practice, in the same room. Devotional life is welcome here, never a requirement, and never used to hurry you past what you feel.

Practical as well as tender. Alongside space to grieve, we build usable tools — for the 3 a.m. hours, the conversation you keep avoiding, the anniversary you are already dreading.

Confidential. What you bring stays here, within the narrow legal limits I will explain fully at the start.

Getting started

  1. Reach outSend a short note using the form below. You do not need the right words.
  2. A brief first conversationWe speak for a short while, with no obligation, so you can hear my voice and ask anything you like.
  3. First sessionMostly you talking and me listening. We decide together what would help.
  4. Continue at your paceWeekly, fortnightly, or as needed — individually, as a couple, or within a group. You may pause at any time.

Fees

Clear and simple

  • First conversation[no charge / amount]
  • Individual session[amount]
  • Couples session[amount]
  • Karuna Care grief group[amount / by donation]
  • Workshops & talksBy arrangement

If cost is the reason you would not otherwise reach out, please say so in your message. [Add a line here about reduced-fee places or insurance, if you offer them.]

Questions

Before you write

Do I need to be a devotee or a practitioner?

No. People of every background and none are welcome. My own practice is Bhakti, and it informs how I listen, but I follow your lead entirely on matters of faith.

What kind of support is this?

This is pastoral and devotee care: grief support, companionship through loss, and relationship support, informed by certified Karuna Care training, grief and loss education, and many years of Nonviolent Communication practice. Some people want devotional accompaniment, some want practical help with a relationship, and some want both. We decide together at the start and revisit it whenever you wish.

Am I grieving wrongly if I am still crying?

No. Sorrow is not a symptom of weak faith. Grief has no correct duration and no correct shape, and I will never measure yours against anyone else’s.

Is what I say confidential?

Yes, with narrow legal exceptions concerning immediate risk to life or the safety of a child or vulnerable adult. I explain these fully in our first session.

Can my spouse and I come separately?

Often, yes. In couples work I usually meet you together, sometimes with one individual session each. I will be transparent about how I handle what is shared privately.

Do you work with people outside the United States?

Yes. I have taught and facilitated internationally for many years, and much of my group work is online. Mention where you are based when you write, along with your time zone, and I will let you know what I can offer.

Is this a replacement for medical or psychiatric care?

No. This support can sit alongside medical or mental health treatment, but it does not replace it, and it is not psychotherapy. If you are already working with a doctor or therapist, I am glad to support that work rather than duplicate it. If you need urgent help, please use the crisis resources below.

Contact

Write to me

You are welcome to keep it to one sentence. I reply within a few days.

Everything you send is treated as confidential. This form is the only way to reach me, which keeps the inbox free of spam.

  • SessionsOnline · in person at Gita Nagari, Pennsylvania by arrangement
  • Based atGita Nagari Farm Community, Pennsylvania
  • Reply timeUsually within a few days
If you are in crisis

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Affiliations & service

  • IFAST
  • The Grihastha Vision Team
  • Karuna Care
  • Heart-to-Heart Vaishnavi Sangha
  • ISKCON Devotee Care
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